Friday, January 23, 2009

Medicine

I'm not a doctor. I just play one on the internet. But I must say I'm pretty good. I diagnosed my neighbor's daughter's ovarian cyst. I diagnosed D.'s hernia. Conventional doctors told them exactly what I did and they charged for their expertise. I offered mine free. Quite the bargain when you consider how accurate my diagnoses are! So now I'm branching out and going to self-diagnose. I really think I suffer from SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). Yes, those who know me will probably say that this is the least of my worries medically but I assure them that being b!tchy is not a medical condition, at least not yet although the DSM-VI or whatever number they are up to now might be including it in the next edition. ;-) My mood takes a steep nose-dive when the weather is grey and gloomy. This is a key reason D. didn't consider for even one minute his boss' suggestion that he think about the job in Seattle. I'm sure it's a lovely city, when it's not raining but they have a high suicide rate there and I'm certain I know why. So instead we moved here to the sunny south, which has been distinctly unsunny on average for the past couple of weeks. And I've been gloomy and grumpy as a result. Let me put my doctor's hat back on and say that I probably need more Vitamin D, more exercise, and one of those odd lamps to feel better. Or the sun needs to come back out and stay out. Hmmm. Maybe I should get my internet degree as a weather girl next.

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