Review: Still Love in Strange Places by Beth Kephart

Beth Kephart has written many different books: a memoir about her son's early years, another memoir on the topic of friendship, YA fiction books, and poetry. This memoir deals with her relationship with her husband, his being Salvadoran and what that means in the framework of a country that has been devastated by war and political upheaval. As in her previous books, this paean to her husband and his native land is rife with lyricism and unusual metaphors and similies. Written about several different trips to El Salvadore, Kephart works hard to graduate from pure outsider to holder of memories, especially in order to pass them along to her son. She includes some of the history, superstition, recent struggles faced by the country in order to understand all that shaped the man her husband Bill became. She flounders with Spanish, finding it quick and impenetrable but she can embrace the stories once translated. She is fascinated by the tales of Bill's grandfather and by the coffee plantation that dominated the family's life. She looks deep into the heart of her husband's origins, her son's heritage, and learns about the framework of her marriage and her own nuclear family.

The writing here is musing, ruminative, meandering from pillar to post, just as in the conversations she hears which are only half translated for her. There is a real sense of exploration and "otherness" in the book. And while Kephart does have her own unique way with words, I found the book difficult on which to stay focused. Chapter titles (Art, Luck, and Freedom are just a few examples) are not the usual sorts of topics for a memoir and perhaps this caused me difficulty. It was definitely thick, slow, dreamy going while I was reading it. But almost all of the reviewers at amazon found it exquisite so I'm clearly in the minority opinion thinking it was an okay read rather than a transcendent one.

Review: Nothing But Ghosts by Beth Kephart

I have read several of Kephart's non-fiction offerings lately but I had never read one of her YA books until I picked this one up. It was getting a lot of pre-publication buzz in the blogging world and I didn't want to miss the boat, nevermind that YA is not my usual bailiwick.

Katie's mother recently died of cancer, leaving her alone to grieve with her father, an art restorer. His method of grieving includes locking himself away with the latest painting he has to work on, leaving his daughter adrift and mourning by herself. Not wanting to be surrounded by people either, Katie has taken a summer job working on the gardening crew of a local estate, the owner of which is an elderly woman who has locked herself away from the world for years. As Katie tries to come to terms with the new normal of life without her mother, she works to uncover the mystery of why Miss Martine, who was once a debutante, has voluntarily locked herself away from the world for so many years. Her father's latest restoration project, two brothers on the gardening crew, and a glamourous librarian all help Katie in her quest for answers and also in healing her heart a little.

The writing here is quite lyrical, making obvious the fact that Kephart is first and foremost a poet. Her descriptors and phrasing are not of the common sort and she definitely draws pictures in the readers' minds. The characters are believable and sympathetic. Katie is always age appropriate and her reaction to the continued loss of her mother will tug at your heartstrings. Ultimately though, there's very little that occurs in this novel and I had to skim back through it in order to write this review. Some of this is because I read it so long ago and didn't write a review immediately but some of it is because the story just didn't stay with me, offering me no little moments that punched their way into the permanence of my brain. That's not to say this isn't a good book because it is and I think that YA readers, both young and old, will appreciate it. It's just that it lacked that little something more for me. Maybe one of you will find it in there instead though.

Review: Into the Tangle of Friendship by Beth Kephart

How do you describe friendship? How do you put into words, without sounding trite or overly sentimental, the essence of what a friend is? Beth Kephart manages to do this terribly difficult thing in a lyrical meditation on the meaning of friendship, how it changes, who we befriend, and why it is important in our lives through her experiences of her own friendships and her observations of her son's and her husband's as well. This is not a funny chronicle of the things she and her friends have done. It is a more spiritual examination of the power of friendship. It is a thoughtful, ruminative writing on just how friendship changes and enriches our life, in small ways and large. As Kephart discovers, our friends help define us, even if they are only briefly a part of our lives. But they round us out and offer themselves to us and Kephart has captured the elusive beauty of this fact with her poetic and honest writing. This book, like the other book of hers that I read, is not a straightforward narrative, relying on the skillful weaving of a descriptive and flowing style to pull together the thread of her thoughts. Billed as a memoir, the chapters have the feel of interconnected essays as much as anything. I would have liked a little more meat to the book but overall, it was a soothing reading experience.

Beth Kephart Reading Challenge

I find I have quite a few of Beth Kephart's books on my tbr shelves. I just keep acquiring them without reading them. In one sense, it's good I keep buying them. It means they appeal to me in terms of subject matter. And buying them shows my support for the author. But it's bad I never get around to reading them. I need to. I suspect my friends are dead tired of me saying, "Oh I have that one. But I haven't read it yet." So the Beth Kephart Reading Challenge it is. Because I don't like to be constrained by categories, I am going to pick the mix-n-match option for this challenge, reading 4 books off the list. This onely runs until June 30th so I'd better get a move on!

Here's my list:

1. Nothing But Ghosts by Beth Kephart
2. Into the Tangle of Friendship by Beth Kephart
3. A Slant of Sun by Beth Kephart
4. Still Love in Strange Places by Beth Kephart

Review: A Slant of Sun by Beth Kephart

The journey into parenthood is always accompanied by surprises. Children never read the handbooks that purport to explain them or offer advice about raising them. And that's just for kids who fit firmly into the herd of "normal." How much harder is it to parent a child who doesn't fit this definition? Beth Kephart's son Jeremy was very young when he was diagnosed with pervasive developmental disorder (not otherwise specified). As her oldest (only) child, Kephart and her husband had no other frame of reference with which to compare Jeremy's behaviour (screaming and terror around strangers, echolalia, obsessive fixations, and an almost autistic retreat into his own world) but it eventually became clear that Jeremy's behaviour was different and warranted examination.

The diagnosis of PDD (NOS) was not a blessing since there was no reliable and proven method for helping these kids or their parents cope with the behaviours and eventually ease the kids into a childhood not marked by difference and struggle but one of normalcy and celebration. This book is Kephart's memoir of trying to do just that for her special boy. She chronicles the uncertainty before the diagnosis, her feelings of failure as a parent, the sense of inadequacy in understanding Jeremy, guilt over possible sources for his disorder, and her fledgling attempts at both recommended therapy and the self-designed therapy that she knows in her heart to be the correct way to reach her little guy. This book chronicles quite a journey, made in fits and starts, with progress and regressions, but all focused on helping Jeremy fit into the world as it is.

It is clear in the writing in this book that Kephart is a poet. The stunning turns of phrase and the juxtaposition of images all point to poetry. She has captured and shared raw emotion, love, frustration, anger, joy, desperation, grief, and confusion in these pages. She lovingly details Jeremy and who he is without sugar-coating the difficulty of having such an undefinable child. This book will not provide a road map for other parents of children with PDD(NOS) because there is no such road map out there. Each child is unique, hence the catch-all diagnosis. But what it does provide is hope and a pervading sense of the power of love. There is a grace here in these words and a deep love for her son. Over all, the narrative is chronological but there's a dreamy feel to it thanks to the descriptive and emotional language. This may stymie some readers and those who are searching for a straightforward account could stumble over the style. But there is much to be gained by reading this account of the grace found in parenting a different, sometimes difficult child, even for those of us who have never faced obstacles like this.