Thursday, February 18, 2010

Crushed

I made one of my children cry this morning before school. Of course, the reason that I made him cry kept me up all night tossing and turning and fighting off nausea. I don't think we can have the rescue dog we were adopting and the whole situation makes me sick to my stomach. (Those not animal inclined might want to quit reading now.)

I did a lot of searching before settling on a cute, special needs schnoodle at a rescue near my parents' house. According to the website, he was about 2, 15-18 lbs., altered, blind and surrendered by a breeder. I called and talked to the woman in charge of the shelter and she told me he was sweet, good with kids, and had, until recently, been with a foster family so was working on housebreaking. She didn't add anything else about the dog. I knew a blind dog would take some extra effort but I was completely willing to do it. I put in an application and made my donation and he was ours. The only hitch was getting him to us. In the end, we decided that my mom's groomer would pick him up, groom him as he was certain to need it, and get him to my mom. Then mom would keep him for a couple of days before coming up here to visit with us, bringing our new boy with her. I have been getting daily updates since he was picked up. He was frightened (to be expected) and not housebroken at all (not thrilled about having to start from scratch but do-able). He's not 15-18 pounds, he's more like 25. That's a pretty significant difference when we wanted a small dog but I was willing to overlook that too.

Each day there was one more thing to report that was not as represented with this poor guy. But last night was horrible and almost certainly means he's going back to the shelter, no matter how much it breaks my heart and that of my kids. Not only was he left with no shot records (supposed to be current on shots) but he's *not* neutered. He's not just blind; he's deaf and almost entirely toothless. He's not just under 2, he's more like 7 or possibly older if the blindness is caused by cataracts from old age. And the deal breaker? He's not a schnoodle but a cockapoo. Now I realize that shelter dogs are very frequently a mix of unknowns but I chose this guy because he was a schnoodle surrendered by a breeder. My husband is allergic to dogs but can tolerate non-shedders. Schnauzers and poodles (hence the schnoodle) are both non-shedders. Cocker spaniels are not non-shedders and therefore cockapoos still shed. Certainly a breeder would know the parentage of their dog, right? And the rescue group has quite a few other schnoodles *and* cockapoos listed on the site so clearly they know there's a difference.

It makes me sick to my stomach that the rescue place lied about the dog just to get him out of there. And I guess if I was a better person, I would take him anyway, despite their lies. But I can't. It's a health issue for my family. And it's breaking my heart for my kids, and for me, and most of all, for this poor frightened dog who has had no stability in his life and has just experienced less thanks to the rescue's misrepresentations. Now I'm going to go crawl back in my bed, nurse my sick stomach, and cry a little for all of us.

13 comments:

  1. Oh, that's so awful. I can understand why you can't take the dog -- your family and their health must come first -- but it doesn't make the situation any less sad. ((HUGS))

    --Anna
    Diary of an Eccentric

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  2. Oh - I can feel your pain and my heart goes out to all of you!

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  3. Kristen, I am so sorry for you all; this is not right to have been deceived. I probably would do the same thing you are faced with.

    My SIL is getting a rescue Cavalier King Charles rescue on Saturday, from some place in GA. They are delivering him to Pet Coin CT. He is now being fostered by people she knows in GA. (Hope she has better luck; she's been so lonely since my brother passed away 3 months ago, so hope this little guy brings her the companionship she needs).

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  4. Kristen, I am so sorry you are having to go through this. And that poor dog. Shame on that rescue group for misrepresenting him! My heart goes out to you and your family.

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  5. What a sad experience for you, your family, and the dog. I sort of understand why a rescuer or shelter might fudge the details a bit in the effort to find a home for a special-needs dog, but it's not fair to anyone - and as your story shows, it's going to be unmasked at some point anyway (and their claims went WAY beyond "fudging"). I'm sorry it turned out like this, but I hope you'll give it another try.

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  6. So sorry to hear this story. We know how quickly and deeply dogs can become family and we really feel for you and your family - and the dog. You are doing a wonderful thing by considering a resuce animal. Hope you find the perfect one for your home.

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  7. I'm so sorry to hear this. My husband and I just went through the rescuing process to get a kitten. We found that a lot of the groups were trying to offload some animals on us that were not what we wanted. We eventually found and adopted an animal that was represented to us correctly and now he is a big part of our little family.
    It is not your fault that the animal was misrepresented to you. I would simply explain your husband's health concerns and explain that you were under the impression that you were adopting an animal that met those needs. They can't fault you for that as it was their problem. If you still want to adopt a dog, let them know.

    I hope it all works out for you.

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  8. Oh Kristen, that's so hard. You are doing the right thing, but it just isn't fair to that poor dog. The rescue people may have had good intentions while deceiving you, but they should have already learned that it doesn't help a dog to be rejected.

    If it were possible to take the poor guy, you would do so. But a better person wouldn't sacrifice a human's health to a dog's. A worse person would procrastinate to make it harder on the dog. It's just an awful situation, made worse because it would have been so easily prevented by those silly shelter people.

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  9. That's heartbreaking! I feel terrible for you and your kids.

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  10. Heartbroken for you, your family and the poor dog! Hugs...

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  11. so sorry for the nightmare that was supposed to be something wonderful. you have to do what's best for your family, though. i hope your family finds the right pet soon. :)

    nat @book, line, and sinker

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  12. This is so sad. I know how hard it is when you become attached to something so adorable. Good luck with everything.

    Also, I have an award for you at The Crowded Leaf.

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  13. Oh that's soo awful and sad. Awful that those people lied and sad that your family and the poor dog are suffering for their mistake. I wish people were more honest about things like these. I hope your son (and you) feel better soon!

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