Merry Christmas and Happy Hanukah 2024

It’s been a year of ups and downs and while this letter isn’t as funny as it once was thanks to kids growing up, it does have a return to vomit, which I know you’ve all missed in recent years. With that fair warning, here’s our 2024:

January: K. ran the humid, sweaty Key West Half Marathon this month. It was a disaster of a run but she was delighted to see the polydactyl cats at the Hemingway House (where she—shockingly—bought a book).

February: D. was busy earning frequent flyer miles this month with business trips to Chicago, Las Vegas, and New York.

March: D. loves the cold and snow so much (HA!) that he went back to Chicago a couple of times this month, including over K.’s birthday. Still debating if it was to get out of giving her a gift or if the quiet of an empty house was the gift.

April: K. got D. tickets to a 3-day music festival that was this month. How to know you’re getting old? You definitely buy the more expensive tickets so you can have access to the private porta-potties, and the free beer, but mostly the porta-potties.

May: K. ran a marathon relay with friends. They took 3rd (of 3, but who’s counting?). K. and D. took a quick trip to Maui for work but they had to leave early to get to Ohio for T.’s college graduation. K. spent the last day of the trip seasick and puking over the side of a small adventure raft so she wasn’t entirely sorry to leave. After graduation, T. moved home, dumping his piles of stuff in the dining room and K.’s office, making it look like we live in an episode of Hoarders. When he and D. headed back to NC, K. went north to Michigan for the summer, where she ran a 10K with her sister. S. won their age group. K. wasn’t last (essentially a win as well) but she is holding a grudge that the fudge prize was not shared with her and was instead taken home to Florida to be shared with family who didn’t run the race.

June: T. sailed in Regionals this month and spent the rest of the month (and much of the summer) looking for a job.

July: D., W., and R. all came up to Michigan over the 4th joining K. and T. It was noisy and wonderful.

August: W. moved into a new apartment in Coral Springs and good parents that we are, we still haven’t seen it. T. sailed in an offshore weekend race in the Atlantic this month. Apparently it was rough seas, which K. was grateful to learn only after T. was safe on shore again since she’d already envisioned A Perfect Storm in her catastrophizing brain. Oh, and everyone on the boat was seasick (so it wasn’t just K. in Hawaii). K. and D. went to Ireland and Scotland for their 25th anniversary trip which Covid had delayed since 2020. Dave did his best to contribute to a nationwide Guinness shortage but he and the friends we traveled with for the Ireland leg were just not up to the task. There were only one or two instances of wrong way turning/driving (and a ton of backseat driving by K. the control freak) so all in all, a success.

September: K. decided that she and D. should take a bicycle tour of Arthur’s Seat outside of Edinburgh but all that happened was that she proved Scottish 5-year-olds are better at riding bikes than she is. After a full Superman over the bike handles, she had two broken ribs and a wrecked shoulder. She did get back on the bike and finish the tour but had to make the acquaintance of the Scottish NHS later that night. T. dog and cat sat while the parents were gone, luckily not starting his new job with AC Talent, working for Weaver Consultants Group in Frankfort, KY, until they were back. He moved into R. and J.’s spare bedroom for a couple of months but left 90% of his stuff at home so we wouldn’t miss him too much (or be able to walk through the dining room). He’s a CQA Technician and uses words like “hot trash,” “sludge viscosity,” and “methane” when describing his job. Delightful, right?! R. and J. got engaged this month. This means K. has to help plan a wedding and D. has to open the wallet enough to pay for it. (Please stop laughing now and say a prayer we don’t kill each other over it!) Another way to know we’re getting old? D. went out to San Francisco to Dreamforce again. Even he is exhausted by all of the schmoozing and partying and K. can’t stay awake long enough to answer a phone call made on Pacific time.

October: This month we had to say a hard goodbye to our sweet 14 ½ year old Gatsby. The house is quiet and sad without her. K. and R. flew up to Mackinac Island to look at possible wedding venues and while K. was brave enough to get back on a bike, she crashed again. No hospital needed this time but she’s taking this as her sign to stay off of bikes forever. When she got home, she was walloped by her first bout with Covid, which D. must have picked up at Dreamforce and kindly shared with her.

November: T. finally moved into his apartment and invited K. to come to Lexington to help him (aka buy him a bed and some other furniture). Why is it that our kids always seem to end up renting places on the highest possible floor in buildings without elevators?! D. didn’t go because he was in Baton Rouge for the LSU-Alabama game with his neighborhood friends (aka the Band of Idiots). His back thanked him for missing out on the move. He also missed snuggling with R. and J.’s sweet new puppy, Fitz, though, so he had to make up for that over Thanksgiving. That puppy’s feet never touched the ground.

Every month: Sammy (8 or 9) hisses at us if we pet him on a schedule he has not approved and Ozzie (6) alternates between K.’s lap and managing D. at work by lounging on the computer keyboard or loafing on the back of Dave’s chair during Zoom calls.

As the year comes to a close, we once again hope that you are surrounded by peace, love, and happiness now and throughout the coming year.

Review: Burst by Mary Otis

Mothers and daughters, perhaps one of the most written about relationships in literature. Is it because the relationships between mothers and daughters can be so fraught, so difficult, so complex? Or is it because it can be so wonderful, so loving, so close? Maybe it's because it can be (and often is) all of those things. And maybe it's because it is so easy to see a daughter becoming her mother, whether intentionally or not. Mary Otis' novel, Burst, is a study in a close and complicated mother daughter relationship, a love story and a mirror, a desire to be different, and all that that entails.

Charlotte and Viva are mother and daughter, best friends, and co-conspirators against the world. Charlotte is a single mother who is troubled and peripatetic (Viva's description on her college applications). She lives on a whim, pulling Viva with her on her adventures as she struggles with an alcohol addiction that leaves her unable to provide for Viva without help from random old friends and her strict older sister, but never from Viva's absent father. Money is always an issue and Charlotte bargains for survival with things she shouldn't. Viva grows up delighted to be her mother's co-pilot in life but learning things from Charlotte that she shouldn't, especially the way that alcohol eases many things. When, as a child, Viva discovers a true talent for dance, there's a chance that she can escape her upbringing until an accident makes clear just how fragile her own life is.

Starting in the 1970s and running through the 1990s, Charlotte and Viva's relationship grows and changes after disappointments and with a more grown-up understanding. The reader watches with sadness as Viva comes to recognize her mother's demons, and to acknowledge that she cannot banish them. That she falls prey to the same demons and darkness feels inevitable even as the reader hopes that she can conquer hers. The time periods of the novel are beautifully drawn with the nostalgia of the time wrapped in the melancholy of the story. The plot moves between Viva and Charlotte (including Charlotte's past as an aspiring artist before Viva) allowing each character's feelings and motivations to be fully explored beyond their relationship to each other. This is a novel about disappointment and love and all the layers of a life shared closely. It was hard to read about all of the poor choices both Charlotte and then Viva make, afraid to hope for resilience. And yet the reader cannot help feeling sorry for the things that derail these women, to want a better outcome than we expect, and for there to be understanding, self-love, and forgiveness in the end.

Review Mercury by Amy Jo Burns

Who doesn't love a good dysfunctional family novel? In her novel, Mercury, Amy Jo Burns has created a quietly satisfying novel peopled with characters you could see sitting around your own table, some you like and some you don't but all of whom share a long and complicated history with you.

When seventeen year old Marley West moves into small town Mercury, PA, she is quickly claimed by Baylor Joseph, the oldest of the three Joseph boys and a local high school football star. Dating Bay gets her invited to dinner with the rest of the Josephs, parents Mick and Elise, and Bay's younger brothers Waylon and Shay. She is witness to the complex family dynamic as an outsider, and eventually a participant as well as a member of the family herself, as Waylon's wife. In fact, she becomes a lynch pin in the family, even as resentments simmer and tensions rise. When a body is unexpectedly uncovered in the attic of the local church thanks to a leaking roof, a roof that Joseph and Sons Roofing fixed years ago, old secrets and hurts will come to light, changing the truth of the past.

This is a novel chock full of private family drama, the weight of expectations, and complicated family relationships. Burns draws realistic characters, some of whom are not entirely sympathetic or likeable. The secrets they carry shape their characters, form the love/hate relationships they feel toward one another, and make the family how and what they are. Although the novel is told in third person, Marley is really the main character, the one who both forces change and acknowledges tradition as she comes into her own. This is a powerful, character driven story of growth, belonging, motherhood, and the traumas that form us.

Thanks to the publisher for a copy of this book to review.